Sunday, December 05, 2010

Number 5 is (a)Live

Can you guess what the most dangerous thing in my house is? Laundry. Seriously. You just never know when a big pile of it is going to fall on top of you avalanche style. Or when you're going to accidentally slam your finger in a dresser drawer. No one should blame me then for calling for the aid of a super hero to help me conquer that most devilish villain.

The web slinger was quite handy at putting away his own socks and undies. And it's true what he says about being Your Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman because he insisted that I feed the poor starving orphaned elf who was residing in our wreath even going so far as to specify that the sprite needed a little tiny napkin to wipe away any Special K crumbs that should happen to fall upon his pointy-toed shoes. 

After such a rough morning's work, it seemed only right to take the crime fighter to brunch and introduce him to some other super powered beings. Take this fellow--he can crack a walnut the size of a watermelon without even breaking a sweat. Do they even grow walnuts that big, you ask? They sure do in this story my friends.

Ever the gentle arachnid, Spidey didn't even mind the paparazzi snappin' pictures while he was trying to enjoy a little down time with his people.  At least not the first six times a photo was taken. After that, their cameras became covered in a white, sticky thread-like material. Spidey swears he knows nothing of it though.  Could have just been a coincidence I guess.

Before he swung himself off to help other Mama's in need, I got the webbed one to help me compose a little haiku. Little known fact: Spiderman is an expert dice roller.

There was one thing that the great super hero could not help me with though--he was unable to ease my feelings of inadequacy for not even having given more than a passing thought to sending Christmas cards when some people have already managed to sign, seal & deliver theirs. Showoffs. 

I think the next time the masked man appears, I'm going to put him to work filling out addresses and affixing stamps. I wonder how legible a 4 year old Spider's handwriting can be?

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