Wake Up Little Suzie

Yes, I know that it's supposed to be Susie, but my mom spells it Suzie so I took a little creative liberty there. Isn't the first time I've done so, and won't be the last either. Anyway, today is my Mama's birthday, and in the off chance that I forget to call her tonight like I did last year, I thought I'd devote an entire post just to her. And you know what that means, right? Vintage pictures!!! Two of my favorites actually.

 

Awwww. Just look at those little shoes! And whose face is that staring back at me--my mother or my daughter? I'm not sure. I'm a bit confused.

And this next one? Well it just makes me laugh. Every time I see it.

According to the back of it, this is my mother's second grade picture. But what I really want to know is who drew the chain link fence over her face, and why? Or is it a grid for target practice? Like I said, makes me giggle.

Happy Birthday Mama!

Of note

*A conversation from this morning:

Mama: Morning Mr. Goo. How are you doing today?

Chase: I forget. I can't remember how I'm doing. Too many questions Mama.

*Amaya spent the entire day at school in dry underwear. Upon arriving home she proceeded to have two accidents.

*I am going to the store tomorrow to buy more girls' 4T underroos.

*I finished DeChristmastizing the house. You can thank the 40° temperatures for this. Otherwise the outside might have stayed lit in all its holiday glory until April. March at the earliest.

*I use this website as a cheat sheet when I have to add special characters like degree symbols to blog posts. Shhh. Don't tell.

*I think Haikubes might be one of my all time favorite Hanukkah presents. Words. On cubes. Does it get any better? I doubt it.

 

*After our Christmas visit, I've been thinking a bit about my brother and the fact that he's a man now. It's hard to wrap my brain around that because in my mind he still looks like this 90% of the time. 

*I've decided I'm ok with him growing up and stuff--as long as he remembers that I'm still the big sister. That means that every once in awhile he has to let me me tackle him to the ground and tickle him until he can't breathe just like the good ole days. That's not too much to ask for is it? 

Dr. Feelgood

Hey Buzz, wanna be friends? 

 

Batman mania continues. Oh and check out the cool wristbands.  Rock star.

Super proud of her pretty Christmas dress. 

Funny retro picture I forgot to share yesterday. Santa scares me. I won't lie. 

Christmas Party: Take Two. Holly? Check. Jolly? Check.

 

 Shot to the head?  Hit me.  Is that all you got?

December Daily Day Six & I'm Running Low on Tricks

It's a pretty boring day here in Mellonland today. Mondays usually are as this is the day that I reserve for boring errands like grocery shopping and boring chores like restoring the house to some sort of order after a weekend of abuse by the children. Still, I'll trudge on through with a post--luckily rambling happens to be a skill at which I excel.


Explain yourself, Elf!

It seems Bernard has a bit of a sweet tooth. That's ok, Bernie--I can relate.

This morning my Facebook news feed was full of people chatting about the snowfall that visited the 'Wood and left the people of Preston County with a day home from school.  Some were complaining, some were rejoicing but most everyone was talking about it. For a brief moment, I thought that we might have been graced with a little of the white stuff too, but when I stepped outside bright and early this morning it was freezing for sure, but no snow.

 See, not a flake to be found.  Totally bummed me out man. So, I decided to spend a moment or two remembering what it was like to have snow in December:

Awww sweet snow! And would you look at that, I'm totally rocking that scarf with those boots and a Care Bear purse. See, even at a young age, I knew how to work an accessory. I see you trying to get a closer look at that purse--so Imma help ya out:

Proud as proud can be--belly bared and all. Style is in the eye of the beholder folks. And if you doubt that, then there's a Care Bear Stare headed your way.

Rebuttal: Dad

So I got an email from my dad today in response to yesterday's post. Thankfully, he hasn't written me out of the will yet. Here in his own typed words, Dad's official statement regarding the allegations that he schmoozes his way out of speeding tickets.

Just to set the record straight.    When I was dating your mom, I traded my VW beetle for a Ford Pick-up Truck.  The day I bought it, I  picked up your mom and then went up to interstate 68 to see how fast it would run. I got caught that day, and I was awarded a ticket, not a warning!  Tell Andy that when his hair turns gray he will get a break too. 

There's only one flaw in your reasoning there Papa--Drew doesn't have any hair to go gray. Guess there won't be any ticket avoiding in his future unless by some miracle he learns how to drive like he has sense. Given the odds of that, I might as well start planning on wallpapering my bedroom with traffic citations. très chic

Just one more question: how many tickets did you rack up while cruising along on this contraption?

I was wrong

My mother's doppelganger is not Megan Fox. Not anymore, anyway.

It's Drew Barrymore. All. the. way.

Who's the Wise Guy?

You know, the joker who put a wig on my son?

Oh, wait. Never mind.

This is why I love Facebook. You can be going about your business and out of nowhere--POOF!--someone (Hi Becky!) posts a photo of you that gives you the heebie jeebies because the resemblance to your offspring is so strong that you can't even see yourself in it anymore. Creepy!

Because I care

If any of you out there are roughly the same age as me (25. What?!?), then you probably remember the fun little Mr. Yuk sticker that your parents placed on various chemicals that they kept under the kitchen sink. Need a refresher? Well, you know me. I aim to please. Here you go:



Creepy as it was, that little green demon did exactly what it was supposed to to do: It kept me from ingesting hazardous household chemicals. Without that green tongue and those scrunched up eyebrows staring back at me, it's hard to tell how many shots of Drano I might have knocked back. So that got me thinking about another important cause that--like child poisoning--is very near and dear to my heart: the eradication of a virus known as the Childhood Perm.

Our youth can't be blamed for past outbreaks of the virus. How could they have known the far reaching effects of a single permanent processing? Had they known, then years of hideous school pictures, tangled webs of matted hair, and the uncontrolled population growth of the "hair pick" could have been avoided. Which is why I'm proposing a Mr. Yukish type icon to scare little ones away from indulging in the hair permanent. Some image so scary, so hideous that with just a single glance, no child would ever again question the dangers of the spiral perm. A picture so grotesque that it will be forever burned into their formative young brains as a visual representation of the horrors awaiting anyone who gets a perm.

Because this cause is so very important to me, I have taken it upon myself to provide our children with just such an image. Behold:

I think you'll agree that it would be nearly impossible to find a more suitable deterrent. So here's what I'm thinking: billboards, print ads, fliers in every salon, and of course we must have stickers--lots and lots of stickers.