Friday, January 14, 2011

I'm Just One Mama

This is a line that I repeat to my children several times a day: "I'm just one Mama, guys. Please be patient" or sometimes it's "How many Mamas am I?" Egocentric as they are, kids have no understanding of why a need stated can't be met the second it has passed their lips. And so they continue to repeat their request with voices amplifying exponentially in whine. Which can at times be a bit much to take first thing in the morning I have to tell you. Especially when you're playing the role of single mother because your husband is busy sunning himself in nice, quiet Cali. But that's not really the point of this post.

The point is that I need to remember to remind myself that I am only one person. I can't be everything to everyone at all times. Being a perfect Mama is not a prerequisite for being a good one.  I need to get off of this mental hamster wheel of 'have tos' and 'should dos' and take time to just be. To enjoy each beautiful moment that life and these two little ones choose to throw at me.

Like say the complete, unbridled delight Chase felt upon finding that he'd been given the gift of an extra large chicken nugget in his happy meal. A double nugget. Wonders, they never cease.  

Or the quiet joy of sitting in an empty coffee shop with nothing to do but sip my latte and watch the snow fall.

Or how wet hair makes my children's eyes pop so much that I just want to reach in there and squeeze both of them until they too pop. Or until I end up soaked myself. Whichever comes first.

And within those moments, I want to remember to take the time to be silly with my children instead of constantly focusing on what's next on my to do list. To give them love and affection and the occasional bunny-eared photo op.

And also to work toward loosening my grip on having to maintain complete control by giving them the freedom to make their own choices however misguided I might think them to be.

See: Polka dot overload and monkey rain boots on a clear day.

And I do believe that if I remember to do all of those things, then it will make it easier for me to find within myself the patience necessary to deal with moments like this:

Gracefully, I mean.

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