Friday, August 20, 2010

Revenge of the Mell

Do you remember back in May when someone had the nerve, the audacity to deface my beautiful car with an ode to Hokie Nation?

You might also remember that I promised to make the perpetrator pay for his crimes against humanity. I'm sure you thought I forgot about it didn't you? Well, I didn't. Up until now, I've contented myself with the odd nefarious prank designed to unnerve my enemy by reminding him that I'm still out there, biding my time. For example, there was the time I flipped the Hokie Magnet on his car upside down. I am sure the neighbors wondered who the crazy lady was maniacally cackling as she skipped away from the scene.

And while I'm thinking about it, why a Hokie Virginia Tech? I mean if you're going to make up some imaginary creature to represent your school on the field of battle, why not something awe-inspiring like a dragon or sphinx instead of a whacked-out, turkey-looking creation?  And why choose a name that is a homophone of a word whose synonyms are listed as: banal, commonplace, dull, feeble, hackneyed, stale & trite? Seems to be a bit counter-intuitive, doesn't it? And don't even get me started on the orange and maroon color combination. Anyway, the point here is that I have not forgotten my duty to avenge my poor Volvo's humiliation. Oh no.

Yesterday, provided me the perfect opportunity for my counter strike. I had unchaperoned access to my enemy's den of evil: his Hokie paraphernalia-plastered office--the very heart of his fan devotion. In this room, no space is left untouched by orange and maroon--even the knobs on the cabinetry could not escape the color clash. It was here that I would carry out my revenge. Mwah ha ha ha ha.

Do you see it? A closer look perhaps? 
Hee, hee. Infiltration complete!
Some might say that because his very kind-hearted, gentle wife is a good friend of mine, I should feel ashamed of my actions. Especially given that the very day that I carried out my plan, she had gifted my daughter with this lovely tricycle. And perhaps they would be right, but you'll never hear me apologize. Nuh uh, no way. All's fair in love and war baby. Plus, he started it.


  1. Anonymous4:58 PM

    Just wait....JUST wait!!! muuuaaahahahahahahaha

  2. haha! good one. i do like the maroon color of the walls though.